Being in love can be a highly enriching and a beautiful thing that any one can realise in his life. Throughout history, humans have always wanted to form this bond with another person and true love is probably the most sought after experience in this world.
It’s never a matter of choice, It never was. No matter what, we Indians end growing up on romantic dramas that Bollywood treat us with. As Raj always manages to find his Simran, we too hope to fall in love as ”someone, some where is made for me”. The story always ends here. We rarely see how they made it work. Everything just falls into place magically and it’s a happy ending. They never show what happens next. After the scene the flowers fill in as the hero and heroine kiss. Or after the scene where the hero marries off the girl and takes her someplace on a bike as the credits roll. Precisely put, the concept of romantic love as depicted in movies or greeting cards pretty much sets us up for disappointment in real life.
In real life we play multiple roles. Sons, daughters, friends besides playing the part of lovers. Sometimes, with the focus entirely on ourselves, we are not being able to understand and respect the needs of the other person. Sometimes the problem is lack of expression or the wrong expression. You may love your partner, but sometimes you may say something that he or she finds insensitive. You may feel that your partner is over-reacting on trivial things. Guys, you may find repeated calls and texts piling up your inbox to be irritating, saying ‘i love you’ silly and all that. But remember that you might just be overlooking her emotions. She longs for silly sweet nothings and that is the way she is. Similarly your man might want to spend some time watching cricket or hanging out with his friends, not letting him his space might make him feel too bound. For any relationship to be successful, it is important to be able to perceive and empathize with the other person’s feelings and emotions.
Love is a process. It takes time grow. It requires togetherness, respect and nurturing, concern for the others´ well being and happiness. Love is not vindictive; it does not abandon nor does it betray, no matter how bad the situation gets, you never leave them alone in it. Together through the good and the bad times. Only those relationships have happy endings where the emotions don’t change with the seasons.
So here’s wishing you the best for this Valentine’s day. Love (Ishq Waala) and happiness await you.
– Soumya Mania Ranjan
Soumya is a qualified psychotherapist who feels that holistic counseling is the call of the hour. Based in Germany, she’s a proud Odia who wishes to give back to the society through her profession.