Garage

A Slut?

Her nails are painted a bright red. She is wearing a pair of denim shorts that goes a little above the knee, a comfortable sleeveless vest, a pair of sunglasses to shield her eyes from the glaring sunlight; she walks like she knows where she.

By Aug 28,2012  8

Her nails are painted a bright red. She is wearing a pair of denim shorts that goes a little above the knee, a comfortable sleeveless vest, a pair of sunglasses to shield her eyes from the glaring sunlight; she walks like she knows where she belongs. Who is “she”? A slut. Come on, she has to be one, can’t you see the signs? Her posture obviously, and look at her clothes! So lets do all we can, through actions and words, to make her awkward.

Being a woman, and if I may add, being a woman in India is not easy. The entire concept about what womanhood means, stands questioned for me today. She must walk in a proper way, talk in a proper way, Behave! Like a ‘girl’ and of course her chastity should be her prime concern. Who made these rules? We do not know. But what we do know is, every little girl, (there maybe exceptions) has been ‘taught’, to behave like a ‘girl’. Have your brothers been ‘taught’ how to behave like a ‘boy’? No, right? Mine hasn’t either.

Women are expected to accept, adapt to, and follow these rules. This has been a tradition, to internalize the archetype setup and accept it in the name of societal norms. By doing this, we internalize patriarchy itself. Our moms taught us how to behave like girls because their mothers taught them that, and their mothers were taught by their grandmothers how to behave like a girl. It is almost comic to me, the whole idea! There seems to be a preconstructed mould for a woman to fit into.

Sexuality might not be a big deal for a man, but my God! A woman simply cannot get away with it! After all, “izzat ka sawaal hai bhai!” let us look at our mythology for a second, since religion means so much to us culture conscious Indians. Draupadi had five husbands and has always made the puritanical, patriarchal commentators uncomfortable. Sita preferred to return to the earth rather than her husband who doubted her chastity after her return from Lanka. I look at it as an expression of independence and contempt for a masculine world view.

My point is, be aware, be aware of everything around you, irrespective of whether you are a girl or a boy, be aware about what you are being taught, what you are listening to, and most importantly what’s going on in your own mind. Make sure you see through the tricks of the world. We do not need privileges to prove ourselves. “Ladies” do not have to be “first”. Let us just do away with the gender bias and try being “human first”. I must not speak anymore, am afraid am being too bold for a girl! “log kya kahenge?!”

Contributed By: Shreeradha Mishra

 

7 Odia Handicrafts You Probably Never Knew About!

Previous

Be Safe, the Rail Way

Next
  • ElessaR

    yeah.. but i dn see anyone marchn around with banners sportn “i dn need da womens reservation bill” or “i cn compete in cat without special considerations”….. u keep pretty mum when it comes to being offered prieveleges but when tis about adjustn to some problems.. we get “im too bold or log kya kahenge” vouch for fairness when u are fair at heart or learn to adjust and to change.. and the las statement is with respect to both the genders…
    freedom and independence is smthn everyone has and can equally ask for .. and i too say it is fair to dress the way u want or to be able to move as u wish… but my intention here is not to engage is a batlle between male and females or between adopting cultures and holding true to ur own heritage.. my point is if we do ask for a dream of a world so very true and egalitarian y dn i see a post sayn i am able and im confident that i can fight without the aid of crutches…once that happens then my friend u wud have earned my respect…

    • She didn’t talk about CAT and reservation stuff because your mother and my grandfather have been discouraging her to study further fearing that she might lose out on a better and prospective groom and that ‘real’ place is in the kitchen….. Reservations are there to compensate for the lack of support to move ahead in life in her vicinity

      And the tone of your comment sounds really mean. It’s like take reservation and give up your independence, else get out of my sight strutting your freedom…

  • Sgt. Pepper

    @ElessaR you are so out o context here, it makes me want to punch you in the face. In fact, for every second that you are not getting punched in the face, a distant star flares into existence to compensate for the enormous potential in the Universe that is going wasted.
    The article here is about a woman’s right to her own body, and her inherent right to be as open about her sexuality as she wants to be. What you have written about is the hypocrisy that we see regarding feminists asking for Reservations and Equality at the same time. But then I know a lot of girls who don’t want Women’s reservations and have never used it to their advantage either. Two totally different topics, and as for the article, it is something BBSR-CTC have been needing for a long time now. Cheers.

  • ElessaR

    true i do agree tis about womens right but then i do ask if they are soo vocal about bein able to move freely smthn which is soo very mch said and repeated again again y not for a change dey say we dn need to be baby sitted through while cryn for fairness sakes deir male counterparts donot.. n as far as few feminists are cncrnd… mate cat has already been biased and soon the nation will be as well.. so in such a scenario i solemnly think speakn of rights without no accountability is either done by people too confused or hen pecked

  • Sgt. Pepper

    You are still missing the context. Are you implying that because a certain woman needs to be “babysitted while crying” or that she demands or doesn’t complain about CAT being biased, she should compensate for that by dressing conservatively? How are the two things even related?

  • HR

    As soon as I saw this article here, I knew it would be a wasted effort !!

  • sahil kandoi

    The article is grt8ly said and very true…….but this whole thing can only go when the women stop feeling victimized…cause that just continues the chain….so go ahead and do wat u feel like without givin a shit abt wat ppl think 😉

  • Bishakha

    a little knowlegde can be very dangerous, was not said in vain. the sentiment with which the article is written deserves merit but reading the comments was disheartening and proved my fears. first of all, feminism doesn’t always talk about ONLY equality, its talks about way beyond it, it talks about celebrating difference and diversity. reservation? have you heard of positive discrimination? read up on why it’s present an then come and talk about it. ask women to stop feeling victimized? find out who Soni Sori is would be my answer. last but not the least, it is important to talk about sexuality, open expression of womens sexuality, alternate sexualities, how our bodies and minds are bound by society but before we delve into it we must understand sexuality, before making a statement on feminism we must understand feminism or we do more harm than aid the ideology. for ex: are boys taught to be boys, yes my dear they are: the process is called socialization, this is how society has succesfully managed to keep defining and redefining masculinity and feminity. the hearts in the right place, a little effort would shut the little buggers who ask lame questions up. cheers.

Email this post to a friend.

or Close

LOG IN

Lost your password?

SIGN UP

LOST PASSWORD